Bad karma
is the only explanation I can think of. Or perhaps hubris, related to my recent brag about our maggot-free lifestyle (see post from 22 May, "Golf Balls"). That's right, more maggots. But this time they were in the Shark. It would seem that when you vacuum up wet food from under the babies' high-chairs, in an apparently futile attempt to reduce the overall filth level, but then don't empty out the Shark in a timely fashion, the overall filth level actually increases. Did I mention that I'm a slow learner? But on the Shark website it even says you can sweep up "soggy pieces of food". . . .
I am so depressed about this. I have been trying so hard to be cleaner, to stay more on top of things. Now this. It really is a blow. I am going to take pictures later of my house and post them, without cleaning up first, b/c while it's admittedly cluttered, I really don't think it's maggot-worthy. That's why I'm convinced that it is karma. So, I'm going to make a list like Earl and try to make amends. Here are 10 bad things I've done, in no particular order:
1. told S-phie I don't like Disney princesses, thus giving her a serious complex b/c she does like them so much
2. don't recycle peanut-butter jars b/c I'm too lazy to wash out the old peanut butter
3. forgot my mother and brother's b-day, which they share, in 1991
4. euthanized S-phie's pet fish, Sea, b/c its tank was too dirty and it seemed sick and its pitiful existence tortured me too much
5. told my twin infants to "remember Andrea Yates" when they were waking me up every hour
6. bought S-phie's Halloween costume at Wal-Mart in 2004 (this should count for two bad acts)
7. see above
8. followed the evil wisdom of Dr. Richard Ferber
9. let my babies' diapers get so wet that they drag on the floor and fall off
10. bit my defenseless baby brother in 1972
I am so depressed about this. I have been trying so hard to be cleaner, to stay more on top of things. Now this. It really is a blow. I am going to take pictures later of my house and post them, without cleaning up first, b/c while it's admittedly cluttered, I really don't think it's maggot-worthy. That's why I'm convinced that it is karma. So, I'm going to make a list like Earl and try to make amends. Here are 10 bad things I've done, in no particular order:
1. told S-phie I don't like Disney princesses, thus giving her a serious complex b/c she does like them so much
2. don't recycle peanut-butter jars b/c I'm too lazy to wash out the old peanut butter
3. forgot my mother and brother's b-day, which they share, in 1991
4. euthanized S-phie's pet fish, Sea, b/c its tank was too dirty and it seemed sick and its pitiful existence tortured me too much
5. told my twin infants to "remember Andrea Yates" when they were waking me up every hour
6. bought S-phie's Halloween costume at Wal-Mart in 2004 (this should count for two bad acts)
7. see above
8. followed the evil wisdom of Dr. Richard Ferber
9. let my babies' diapers get so wet that they drag on the floor and fall off
10. bit my defenseless baby brother in 1972
posted by mama at 11:06 AM
2 Comments:
Don't worry about the maggots too much. I'm a bit of a slob but don't think my house is maggot-worthy either. But apparently maggots can hatch in an amazingly short amount of time. One day I came home to a funky smell in my cheapo lidless trash can. Upon closer inspection, I discovered a teeming mass of maggots. About 100 of them (or more, who really knows?) had escaped and were making their way in all directions across my linoleum. This was probably the most horrifying moment of my adult life. I used an entire roll of paper towells soaked in clorox to sop up every nasty little maggot. As soon as I thought I had them all, another castaway would slink out from under the baseboard and take off across the floor. And I never did get them all; about a week later I came home to a house full of flies and quickly discovered the best way to get rid of them is to suck em up in the vacuum. I am now the proud owner of a $60 stainless steel fliptop trash can from Target. No maggots since!
Thanks, Lindsay, for coming out about your maggot experience. It does make me feel better. If only a steel trash can could solve my problems - maybe some kind of surgical steel highchairs. I was thinking tonight that it's just that I was born too early and if only I had a cleaning robot, like on the Jetsons, everything would be peachy.
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